When I was young I felt unwanted. I believed I had to fight for attention and walked on eggshells, not knowing when my family would be pleased or angry with me. As I grew older I began to seek the emotional connection and affection I longed for in romantic relationships. Looking for love, I didn’t realize I was slowly developing an addiction. During this time I continued to work, attend church, and lead youth groups. On the outside it seemed like I had it all together, but on the inside I was broken and in bondage. I was leading a double life. Later on my pastors confronted me about my struggles and recommended Mercy Canada to me. I felt so exposed and ashamed, but at the same time I was relieved I didn’t have to hide anymore. I was so tired of trying to control and fix everything on my own.
During my time at Mercy, I experienced God’s grace in so many areas of my life. Not only over my struggles, but also the moments in the past when I felt unloved. For the first time, I felt God’s unconditional love for me and I learned that I don’t have to perform to be loved. This gave me so much freedom to walk confidently in my role as the daughter of the one true King. I came to embrace the worshiper that God put in me and am now more comfortable in using my voice. I also learned to bring the lies in my life to the light and fight them with the truth.
The environment of the Mercy home helped me be more in touch with and care for my needs. I became more confident to ask for help when I needed it, and I learned there are people alongside me that won’t take advantage of my vulnerability. I learned to be truer to myself and that I don’t have to hide behind masks anymore. I connected with my emotions and embraced them. I learned to accept that I’ve been hurt by others and I’ve hurt others as well. Because of my iniquities, God’s goodness and love are now much clearer. I’ve experienced God’s strength in my weakness.
Above all else, my time at Mercy enabled me to spend time with my True Love. God showed me what real love looks like. He loves me, others love me, and I can love myself and others in healthy ways. He has shown me what I’ve been looking for all along…that I don’t have to pursue love anywhere else because Love was, still is, and always will be pursuing me.
To supporters and friends of Mercy, thank you so much! My life is changed and I’m now free from the things I thought were forever going to chain me down. Thank for believing for the transformation in me!